15 tips for developing flexible stability (tips 1 - 5)
In today's ever-changing world, the static picture of stability and security that people used to find in their work is increasingly non-existent. What's needed now is a different kind of stability, one based on the ability to flow with change rather than white-knuckling a rigid state of existence.
I call that flexible stability.
Much of the quest for stability boils down to one thing: a desire to know that the future is going to be OK. With flexible stability, your sense of security in the future comes not from knowing that everything will stay the same, but that you can navigate fluidly through whatever change comes your way.
Whether you are a natural risk taker or someone who needs a sense of safety and security in your life, developing that flexible stability can only be beneficial. In the next few posts, I'm going to outline fifteen tips for fostering that flexible stability in your own life. Here are tips one through five.
1. Understand your core
Part of a sense of instability comes from feeling like life has you spinning ass over teakettle with no solid ground in sight. Understanding who you are at the core gives you a fixed frame of reference, helping reduce the feeling of vertigo.
You may be spinning, but at least there's one solid point you can focus on that's not moving. Who you are - what energizes you, what drives you, what you value, etc. - is the one thing that remains constant amidst all the change the world throws your way. Understanding that core gives you something concrete to base your direction and decisions on.
If you don't know what's at the core, the winds of change can blow you all over the place. And because you don't know where you really belong, you're likely to feel a sense of uncertainty wherever you land.
2. Take a H.O.T. Wheel approach
As you head down the road, remember to keep your Hands On The Wheel. Too many people take their hands off the wheel, yielding power over their lives to circumstance. The result is a resigned sense of helplessness.
But in reality, you are in control of where you're going and how you're going to get there.
Sure, you have constraints. We all do. The key is to look at those constraints
and say, "OK, given these constraints, how do I get there?" Resist the urge to play the victim.
2. Exercise your change muscle
Part of the pain of change comes simply because we're not used to it. We grow attached to having things a certain way, and it throws us off when we're thrown into something new.
Try exercising your change muscle. Incorporate variety into your life. Put yourself in new situations where you have to adapt. Ask yourself, "Where am I in a rut," and brainstorm alternatives.
3. Build & nurture relationships
Of all the people I've interviewed over the years who have successfully pursued their passions in their careers, almost every single one said some variation of, "I couldn't have done it without ______." The blank was filled in by people who had been significant to their success.
The relationships in your life - whether personal or professional - can make all the difference in navigating through both ideal sailing conditions and stormy weather.
In various guises those relationships can offer insights, objective perspectives, and ideas. They can open doors. And they can be a source of both emotional support and inspiration.
4. Accumulate knowledge & skills
The more tools you have to work with, the more readily you can engage and adapt to any given situation. Take stock of the knowledge and skills you currently have, and be on a constant quest for more.
Spend some time exploring how you might apply them if you were in a situation where change was either desired or simply necessary. Do dress rehearsals in your head so when the time for change comes (and it will, in some form), you're not scrambling to figure it out.
5. Develop a solutions focus
When you're going along and discover an obstacle blocking the path, you have two choices. You can either stand and focus on the obstacle, wailing and gnashing your teeth that you can't go any farther, or you can start looking for a way around it. The bypass is often there, if you look hard enough.
When you make a habit of looking for the solution, obstacles lose some of their power. Rather than being something that proves that your goal can't be achieved, they become just a part of the landscape. A hindrance or irritation, perhaps, but not a show stopper.
Coming up next: Tips 6 - 10...
6. Take an outside perspective
7. Get grounded
8. Build positive beliefs
9. Develop healthy habits
10. Practice succeeding
Curt Rosengren, Passion Catalyst TM
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